1 Peter 5:2-4, 6-11 "2 Be shepherds of God's flock that is under your care watching over them-not because you must, but because you are willing, as God wants you to be; not pursuing dishonest gain, but eager to serve; 3 no lording it over those entrusted to you, but being examples to the flock. 4 And when the Chief Shepherd appears, you will receive the crown of glory that will never fade away. 6 Humble yourselves, therefore, under God's mighty hand, that He may lift you up in due time. 7 Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you. 8 Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. 9 Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that the family of believers throughout the world is undergoing the same kind of sufferings. 10 And the God of all grace, who called you to His eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will Himself restore you and make you strong, firm, and steadfast. 11 To Him be the power forever and ever. Amen"
I think back to the time when I realized that I was called to be a firefighter paramedic. I was not afraid. Why would I be? I was only thirteen. I believe after starting the career, when the reality of having peoples' lives in my hands hit me is when I realized the reality of my call and fear crept in. I was consumed with ideas that lead me to question; Am I good enough? Will I be able to perform under the pressure? Will I perform to up to the standard? What will my co-workers think of my skill level? Will I cause someone to die?
Those and other questions would run in and out of my mind for a number of years up until I had gained enough experience to provide a greater since of confidence in God's call in my life and my ability to do it. I saw that, yes I had a tremendous responsibility to keep up with my skills and knowledge, but could see that God was with me, even in my weaknesses. I could see that my fear or worry was routed out of my distrust in God and desire to have control in every situation. The truth is, I would not.
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